• Brynn Paulin

Promised Words


Good morning! I had planned to announce a coming soon book (giving more details and such, because you can find the book on my coming soon page already), but...you know...life. The book is still in edits. I'll share more on that tomorrow in my month-end writing recap. The thing is...I promised words every Monday to Friday, so today it's an off-the-cuff post.


So how about promises? How do you feel about them? I find that most of us are a lot better at keeping promises to other people than to ourselves. We don't think anything of it. Still, when we make plans for ourselves then break them, we are breaking promises. But it's just me, you say. I can rearrange.


Call it what you will. Rearranging. Rescheduling. Re-prioritizing. Thinking of others first. Selflessness. Whatever. You told yourself you were going to do [FILL IN THE BLANK] and you didn't. You broke a promise to yourself. You know what happens then? You stop believing yourself. Maybe not the first time. Maybe not the second. But it will happen. You stop believing in yourself. You stop investing in yourself. You learn to let go of what you really want.


Be careful! Do you know how hard it is to start believing again? It takes a lot of time investment and reprogramming to get yourself on track again.


For me, it's taken rigorous time-blocking, constant self-talk and vigilant checks. For a long time, several years in fact, I stopped believing in myself, so I know what I'm talking about. During that time, I didn't keep promises to myself, and in turn, stopped counting on myself to "get it done."


On the outside, things looked fine. I was high achieving in outward areas, but I was low achieving in many places that mattered. To speak on one of those arenas: My writing career reflects my loss of belief. I went from 10-14 new books a year to 1, maybe 2. Blogging every day to blogging once a year. Not journaling because I was avoiding myself and the truth.


I'm recovering from all that. I will probably never get back to that high level of productivity. In many ways, it was flat-out unhealthy. But I can do a lot better than 1 new book a year. As a writer, I've struggled hard to get back on track. I had stopped keeping my promised appointments with myself. Rescheduling. Putting it off. Not showing up. When I finally arrived, the will to get out the words was fleeting. My creativity failed to arrive with me. It's no fun to spend days or weeks forcing out the sentences or struggling with every little phrase. It's a fight not to think/say: Why bother?


Have any of you experienced this? Anything like this?


Was it with getting in active? With eating better? With self-care? With taking needed down time? Working toward your dreams? Etc. You name it. What promises are you breaking? I know mine.


I hope you all are better at keeping promises to yourself than I am.


Have a wonderful day. Love yourselves!

~~ Brynn

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